HYSMW Keepers, or Lack Thereof

Where’sMyWieters going to have a hard time picking his keepers.  Not because there are many choices, but because there are so few.  Who would you choose out of this group?

  • “Legendary”/future centerfielder/3rd best SS in NY
  • .325 OBP wiz OF on the worst team in the AL East
  • #~10 1B/concussbot real Canadian canadian
  • one hit wonder from the north
  • Prospect C aka “bust of the century”
  • Constantly underachieving 3B on the worst team in baseball
  • #1 pitcher from 2003 draft
  • 15/30 OF with a .320 OBP

And those are the best 8 options.  phew.

#1 Justin Morneau

Justin Morneau is wisely prepping for his career following his next concussion.  What a pussy.  I thought Canadian canadians were supposed to be tough.  Closer investigation revealed his gf/wife/slampiece is not bad looking, so he is probably gay.  wife

#2 Jose Bautista

Is this guy for real?  What is with that beard.  Here is a link to Jose Bautista’s player page

#3 Ryan Zimmerman

This looks a lot worse with Bautista already capable of filling the 3B spot.  And he is about 1/2 as good.  Oooooooo, defense.  Whatever.  Here is generally what I think of Ryan Zimmerman.

Huge dropoff after the top 3.

Pick the next three out of a hat and have fun finishing in 7th place:

Jones – 3 OF I would rather have?  Carlos Lee, Jason Bay, Michael Bourn.  Oh yeah, and they all suck.

Santana – will his arm fall off?  75% yes.  And his team sucks.  Terrible.  F.

Jeter – ahahhhahahahhaaha

Wieters – invented AIDS

Victorino – see Jones, Adam, above, add some counting stats, subtract some talent.